Do you consider yourself to be a “High Maintenance” type of person?
I’ve been pondering this subject the past few days. I’m not sure I understand the complete scope of “high maintenance.”
Of course, there are women who expect lots of BLING, and clothing and cars to maintain that image. I consider that to be HM.
But, there has to be an aspect to high maintenance that doesn’t involve material things. For instance, is the expectation that one’s husband will be nice to his in-laws high maintenance?
Is expecting to be given coffee in bed before you start the day HM?
Is hogging the conversation, or jabbering away HM?
What about assuming that your spouse will share the household duties?
Does a partner pursuing their own interests, taking time away from your relationship and your family constitute HM?
What about the high-powered businessman who comes home to sleep, and turns around and goes back to work…..is HE HM?
I’m not really sure I know the definition, and I’d like a little help. From your perspective, what makes a high maintenance partner?

I’d never heard the term “high maintenance” used in reference to a wife or girl friend until I started chatting on-line what feels like centuries ago, but must be about seven or eight years past. I have a friend from that era who would proudly tell you that she’s high maintenance. Dear Husband and I traveled to visit this lady and her family, as well as some of our other on-line friends one year, and we had the chance to hear first hand her moan of CAWWWWWWWFEEEEEEEEEEE from her bed, mid-morning after entertaining us the previous evening.
I have to be careful here (hiding a grin), because she’s likely to stumble over this post, so I’m not going to give a laundry list of what it takes to maintain her. She’s proud of her status, and she’s still married, so that says to me that she’s worth it! *G*
The phrase “High Maintenance” has continued to rumble around in my head over the years, and last night I asked Dear Husband if he considered me to be high maintenance. Let’s face it, I was fishing for a compliment. I am one of the lowest maintenance women you will ever meet, at least I THINK I am. I expected Dear Husband to immediately say, “No Way!”
There was a pregnant pause….and my hackles rose a tiny bit.
Then he said, “Yes.”
You’d have to know DH. He’s not a wordy kinda guy. I suppose it comes from years of living with me. I don’t tend to let him get many words in edgewise, one of my biggest failings. WHEN he has something to say, he says it. Otherwise, I fill up the spaces.
“Yes,” was not what I wanted OR expected to hear.
So, I asked him to give me some idea of what makes me high maintenance, so that I might be able to work on it.
Another pregnant pause. (I’m starting to worry at this point. Who stole my husband’s body and replaced it with this alien???)
“Weeding.”
“WHAT??”
Dear Husband mows the lawn. I am responsible for the gardens. When my back is in bad shape, DH and Second Son will give me a hand moving compost and mulch. When I have wheelbarrows worth of weeds, I collect them in one spot, and HOPE the guys will take them to the back forty for me.
“Well……MOVING the weeds.”
I didn’t kill him. I didn’t scream at him. I didn’t chide him for his lack of help with the house and grounds. I restrained myself.
But I did suggest to him that I wasn’t high maintenance, but that the WEEDS WERE!
And I went off to play at my sewing machine.