My thanks to my oldest stepson, who sends me lists! THe most recent list:
1. The two most common elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity.
2. If at first you don’t succeed, skydiving is not for you.
3. Money can’t buy happiness, but it sure makes misery easier to live with.
4. Deja moo: The feeling that you’ve heard this bull before.
5. Psychiatrists say that 1 of 4 people are mentally ill. Check three friends.
If they’re OK, you’re it.
6. Nothing in the known universe travels faster than a bad check.
7. A truly wise man never plays leapfrog with a unicorn.
8. It has recently been discovered that research causes cancer in rats.
9. Always remember to pillage BEFORE you burn.
10. If you are given an open-book exam, you will forget your book.
11. If you are given a take-home test, you will forget where you live.
12. The trouble with doing something right the first time is that nobody
appreciates how difficult it was.
13. It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning
to others.
14. Gravity Law: You can’t fall off the floor.
15. The average woman would rather have beauty than brains because the
average man can see better than he can think.
16. Clothes make the man. Naked people have little-to- no influence on society.
17. Vital papers will demonstrate their vitality by moving from where
you left them to where you can’t find them.
18. Law of Probability Dispersal: Whatever it is that hits the fan will
not be evenly distributed

Have there been occasions when you didn’t get a picture that you really regret? We are not terribly into taking pictures. I buy an instant camera each spring and record the flower gardens and the herb garden. I take a picture of my grandson each summer when he comes to visit, measuring his growth against his grandfather. I’ve been taking pictures of Defer because this may be his last summer with us.
But there was an occasion when I needed to take an entire roll of film, and not a single picture turned out.
When our grandson was perhaps five years old, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles were really popular. He adored them and owned almost all the action toys from the movies. He was coming to us for his annual visit, and DH decided to do something special for him.
I didn’t know what he had planned until he asked for my assistance. He called me into the bedroom and asked if I would help him put “the shell” on. DH had stopped at a costume shop and rented one of the TMN Turtle costumes. As I recall, he was Michaelangelo.
I had been trying to get my husband to wear tights with a swashbuckler’s costume for Halloween for years! The man has fabulous legs and a nothing tush! He would look fantastic in a costume like that, but the tights were the hangup. It seems real men don’t wear tights. I thought that maybe as a joke I’d get him into them after “Robin Hood, Men in Tights” came out, but it was no deal.
But, for his grandson, he had slithered into the tights and a green turtleneck (what else) and now he needed help to get the rest of the costume on.
It only took a few seconds, and then I was instructed to take our grandson out to the front walk. When “the Turtle” walked up the sidewalk, he didn’t know what to think. At first he was a bit shy, and then he looked a little skeptical. You could see that he was trying to figure out what was wrong with the picture.
DH kept the conversation to a minimum, and avoided doing any backflips. I took plenty of pictures, hoping for proof that my husband had actually worn tights, and then it was finally time for our visitor to go.
I keep hoping that one day he’ll give in. I took him to the “Pirates of the Caribbean” thinking that it might get him in the mood, but no such luck. The day I finally get him to wear tights you’ll hear me all the way from Chicago….WOOOOOOOOOOOOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

I feel another bout of simplification coming on. It happens every time I get to sit down with my newest copy of “Real Simple.” This magazine has come along just at a time in my life when I long to get back to the nitty gritty. It has guidelines for simplifying every aspect of life. Usually I pay attention to those which simplify chores. Anyone in his right mind wants to make chores easier so they can get on to the good things in life.
But….this time the item that caught my eye was on multitasking.

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My newspaper brought me the information that businessmen in Chicago feel that they need an edge. A number of them are finding it by having a third of their gray removed.
Would I lie to you?

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I was visiting billy’s blog yesterday and took a side trip to meet eloon. She has a very funny story about the power of suggestion on Thursday, August 7, starting with

I was visiting at Altered Perceptions this morning, and came across a post questioning whether there should be a Code of Ethics for bloggers. Dawn provided a link to Calblog where the proposal for the Code of Ethics has been made. I strongly encourage you to visit and read the comments, but I’ll summarize them here.
First, it was felt by many that the term “Code of Ethics” was inappropriate due to the fact that blogs are a personal rather than professional endeavor. Anticipatory Retaliation suggested that it might be more appropriate to call them “Standards,” since standards do not carry any moral weight.
The sugggestion that most appealed to me was that each blogger should post their own guidelines in the “About Me” section of their blog. The most commonplace, and generally agreed upon guidelines are these:
1. Give credit where credit is due. Link to your sources when your post builds
off someone else’s work. Cite original information.
2. If you are reporting on factual information, check your facts.
3. Do not change a post significantly once it has been established on your blog.
Personally, I will go back to change typos, grammar goofs, and broken
links within the first few minutes after I have posted, but rather than edit a
post in a way that changes the message, the better choice is to add an
Update at the bottom of the post.
4. Somewhere at your site, post your stand on the issue of comments. Let
your readers know in advance how you handle obscenity or personal
attacks, should you choose to delete this material from your blog.
5. Do not delete a post. I’m not sure I agree with this. I have deleted one
post and the comments that went with it. It was a personal rant that I later
regretted. In the future, I might also delete a post if it caused me grief. I’d
like to see some discussion of this issue as to why a blogger shouldn’t have
control over their own blog.
In the comment section at Calblog, Claxton6 (who does not have a blog link) suggested that bloggers might want to read Rebecca Blood’s “Weblog Ethics.” I find them appropriate for blogs which focus on news or political issues, but to some degree, unnecessary for those of us whose blogs are personal commentary.
If you read Dawn’s post, you’ll see that she doesn’t feel blog police are necessary or desirable, and I agree with her. However, a collection of common practices that might guide new bloggers as they put their oars in the stream is a good idea. Let each person post their own guidelines and no one will have to pony up for police uniforms.

Sorry, Sir. I’m learning how to embed pictures tonight, and I needed the practice *smirk*