Two days before Thanksgiving the element in one of the ovens died. I called my absolute favorite handyman, the appliance repair guy, only to find that three weeks earlier he had sold his company and moved his wife to Arizona for health reasons.
BUMMER!!! I let the guy who bought his business into my house, and I already regret it. He said he thought he might have the element back at the shop. I figured he was hosing me…..and he was. When I finally tracked him down the Saturday AFTER Thanksgiving, he told me that he had to order the part.
I began to worry that the element on the second oven was dying, too, so I called him back and told him to order another element, and he could change them both at the same time. I didn’t want to have to pay him for two visits, and I didn’t want to have to put up with him for two visits.
So, today it is eighteen days since we last saw him (and gave him a check for the element). I called to ask when we might be seeing him. He asked if it had been two weeks, and I told him it had been 18 days. No, he asked….two weeks since we ordered the SECOND element. No. It’s been about 10 days.
He’s going to call the factory on Monday to see when we can expect the back ordered part. I’m going to call him Tuesday to find out when we can expect HIM! I told him that this was Christmas cookie season and we couldn’t be without the ovens much longer.
I don’t think I made any impression on him.

After several days of not enough hours in the day, I finally had the chance to catch up on some blog reading. Over at billy’s blog, the subject was charity.
He and I have similar concerns. We both have given larger gifts in previous years and have cut back in our gift giving. Unfortunately, charities need our assistance more than ever.
The US government is balancing it’s budget in part by cutting back on grants to charitable organizations. Every single one of those organizations is calling my home and filling my mailbox with their pleas for help.
One year, I had the brilliant idea that I would give a large number of groups small amounts, dispersing what I had to share not quite to the nth degree. WOW, was that a BAD idea! Now they are selling their mailing lists and I am drowning in the volume of requests for help.
We have decided not to respond to ANY request for donations over the phone. Fund raisers are getting testier than they’ve been in the past, and some are downright rude. I try to interrupt them early in their spiel so I don’t waste their time, and if they don’t accept no, but keep right on, I hang up. It makes me feel rotten.
I have focused on four charities that I wish to support: Habitat for Humanity, the Salvation Army, a local food pantry and the Neediest Kid’s Fund, sponsored by WGN radio. We occasionally support the Cancer Fund, too, but those donations are not made at Christmas. I can think of dozens of other groups I’d like to support, including anything having to do with education, or helping destitute families.
I’m trying to budget here and there, so that I can make my contributions for the year, and it seems that each year things have gotten tighter and tighter. We clean out closets and make donations to the groups that accept things for resale, or to help destitute families. I give change to the seasonal collections, I write small checks here and there, and try to give my time where I can. I can’t help feeling it’s not enough.
There was a time when families took care of their own. Those who didn’t have families fell back on the charity of the church. Occasionally a forward thinking community had a fund to help in emergencies. I can’t tell if there is less of that support now than when I was a kid, or if maybe it’s just that I am living in a more affluent area, where there is less need. I’m sure the federal government is doing less than it did even forty years ago.
When do you make the choice to save for your own need and cut back on charitable giving? We all believe that great things come from small starts. We’ve read about kids collecting pennies for a cause, or selling lemonade to make money to donate. We all believe that gifts like that snowball and grow, much in the way of the parable of the fishes and the loaves. I worry about being stingy with my donations. Those of us with good fortune need to share, after all.
Short of joining an order and taking on a vow of poverty, what is enough?
Dear Husband believes that charity begins at home. He feels that we should support our family, and I believe that we need to reach out further. We’ve had to compromise to satisfy each other’s philosophy. As things get tighter, we are doing less for others. This is one of those times when I’d like to be wealthy. I wonder if someone like Bill Gates has the same kind of discussions we have? “Do you think we should give another million to the food pantry?” “No, we’ve already hit the limit for charitable donations for the year.”

Are you one of those people who has never taken a sick day in their life? Did you make it through school with perfect attendance?
Do you take “mental health” days? Or, do you take every possible day off that you can without being fired?
I suspect that most of us fall somewhere in between those two extremes. I think I have taken one sick day when I wasn’t sick. There could be more, but there is only one that comes to my mind.
Some companies roll over sick days, some insist that you can not have more than six or so a year. I was listening to the radio, and one teacher who is near retirement has amassed more sick days than days in a school year, so she is going to have a “sick year.” It amounts to early retirement with her still being on the school district’s books for one last year.
There are two schools of thought on this subject. Some people feel that we recuperate faster if we stay home when we are ill. And it’s been suggested that it’s wiser to stay at home when you are ill rather than contaminating all those around you. AND, there are those who believe that you need mental health days.
Others believe that it is irresponsible to take a day off when you are not ill, and that you shouldn’t take a sick day unless you are seriously ill. Part of this philosophy has to do with responsibility to your company, part of it has to do with making ethical decisions.
Returning after a couple of days……
I took the day off on Wednesday of this week, thinking as the day started that I was sick. Still, I cleaned the kitchen, did several loads of laundry, made endless cups of tea, and played at my sewing table for an hour or two working on a Christmas gift. I was sure I had a cold. When things eased, I thought that perhaps it was allergies. And finally, I decided I was going to live, and got on with my life. Still, I didn’t work in the office, and I didn’t go out to do the marketing. I guess I played hookey.
I am in the enviable position of being able to choose when I put in the required time for my job. When I abandon my office, I make up the hours in the evening, or on the weekend. I’ve had eighteen years of this freedom. When Dear Husband retires, and my job ends, I worry that I won’t be able to adjust to the real world of punch clocks.
I have a great sense of obligation. I’d feel guilty about calling in if I wasn’t seriously ill, but I’m sure I’m spoiled by the freedom I’ve come to expect. That’s my Libran personality at work.
So……do you play hookey, or would you never think of missing a day at work?

Any day that starts out with two inches of cold rain and a visit to the periodontist, is a day when staying in bed would have been preferable!
Since it was going to be such a rotten day from the start, I tried to arrange for my overdue mammogram, too. Unfortunately, they couldn’t squeeze me in (pun intended), and I have to make an appointment and go back.
So, I had more than two hours to kill before another doctor’s appointment. I used it to get a little Christmas shopping done.
The day is incredibly gray and rainy, and this evening we are to take my mother to dinner for her birthday. I don’t want to cook, but I’m not thrilled about having to go out again. Mother deserves a more chipper companion than I’m likely to be.
I’ve had better days.

I had to con my cat today.
Ed does not care for parties. He actually likes a few of the members of my family, but he doesn’t do well when they come to visit in droves. He must have known something was up this morning, because there was cleaning going on, when we should have been having a quiet morning.
When the door was open a moment too long, he beat a retreat, and spent the day hunting outside. Since it was in the 40s today, I figured he would be fine outside, and generally ignored him.
As it got dark, someone managed to get him into the garage, but my Mother couldn’t get him to come into the house. I tried, and he snooted me.
So….I left the door from the mudroom to the garage ajar, and turned out the lights. Then I left the door from the mudroom to the rest of the house ajar. A few minutes later there was a streak of black as the cat flew through the house to the safety of my office.
It’s nice to know that I still have the touch! *G*

The past two weeks have been tough! Part of my family celebrated Thanksgiving here, so we started about a week before, cleaning and decorating. The day was quite a success.
Then, we had ten days to prepare for an open house for my mother, who will be 88 on Tuesday. Of course there was more cleaning, but we also needed to take down all the Thanksgiving decorations and put up most of our Christmas decorations. The Christmas tree in the living room will wait to go up until close to Christmas Eve. The house is so dry that a live tree turns to tinder in less thatn three weeks. So, we put up wreaths, stockings, Christmas quilts, and decorations, and I put garland around the front door, and swags at the carriage lights.
Early in November we sent out invitations to our family, to the Empty Nesters group at church, to our entire exercise group, and to a wide range of friends. She even invited her favorite doctor and her pastor.
Without an incredible amount of help from my nieces and one of my sisters, I could never have pulled it all off. My youngest sister and one of her daughters came Saturday and we prepared the ubiquitous toasted cereal mix. (I have TONS left!) We vacuumed and cleaned, and set up coffee, tea, iced tea, soda pop and wine stations around the outside counters of the kitchen.
Two of my nieces work for a large grocery chain and they arranged nine trays of finger food and 8 of desserts. We had dips, veggies, fruit, cheese, lunch meats, shrimp and taco salad. There were tortes, cookies, cakes, and fruit tarts. We covered the center island of the kitchen, and a good part of the dining room table. No one went hungry, and we encouraged guests and family to take food home.
The house was crammed with visitors. The Empty Nesters came early and departed in about 45 minutes, because they had to go to choir practice. The exercise group came next, and they stayed and chatted for most of the afternoon. Then family came in several waves. It was wonderful to have a full house!
Everyone gravitated to the kitchen, or to the two rooms off the kitchen. It doesn’t matter who we invite to parties….they all end up in my kitchen. It was a great party.
Most of the food has been refrigerated. I’ll wash wine glasses tomorrow, and I’ll get Dear Husband to take the recycling stuff out to the bins, and we’ll try to get back to normal.
Now, I need to get my Christmas shopping done. I wonder if I could do it by proxy???

I’m participating in my very first eBay auction.
I read a magazine titled “American Patchwork and Quilting.” Last year, they asked their readers to donate a 10″ square block of any pattern made in pink and white. The aim was to sew the donated blocks into quilts and auction them on eBay, to raise funds for the Susan G. Komen Breast Cancer Foundation.
The readers rose to the challenge, and the magazine has received more than 25,000 quilt blocks! Hundreds of quilt guild members, quilt designers, quilt shop owners and others volunteered to assemble the blocks into quilts. Batting, backing, setting fabric and time were all donated, and nearly 500 quilts will be put up for auction.
In the few weeks that the auction has been running, they have already raised $25,000. The auction runs until December 31st, with new items being listed every week. ALL of the money raised through the auction will go to research. None of it will be kept for administrative expenses.
I have never participated in an eBay auction, but I think this is an exceptional place to start. I’ve bid on two of the quilts, and I have about eighteen hours to go to find out if I’ve won either or both of them. I have a five year old niece who is addicted to pink. I can’t think of a better Christmas gift for her. She will be cozy, snuggled into her own pink and white quilt, and when she is older, I can tell her the significance of the gift. It’s definitely a Win-Win situation!
This is an exceptional way for women to show solidarity. Women pieced blocks, women quilted the quilt tops, and the result of their efforts may one day save women who are facing breast cancer. That doesn’t mean we discourage men from participating. We hope everyone will help in some way to wipe out this dreadful disease.
If you’d like to participate in the auction, or even if you’d just like to see what is being auctioned, go to www.ebay.com/apqqfc.
Wish me luck!
UPDATE: YEEEEEEEEEHAWWWWWWWWWW!! I WON my first quilt!

My mother will be 88 very shortly. I’ve probably said that fifty times in the past six months. It’s amazing to me that she will be EIGHTY EIGHT!
About six or seven years ago, Dear Husband and I went to New Orleans for a few days rest and relaxation. We had dinner in a fabulous restaurant called “The Courtyard of the Two Sisters.” We enjoyed our elegant dinner so much, we returned for lunch the next day. Ever since, I have been trying to persuade my mother to hop a plane for two days and a night in the Big Easy to celebrate her birthday at the “Courtyard.”
This year, she announced that if she made it to ninety, she wanted to celebrate in Paris! I like a woman who thinks BIG! *G*
Since we are not going to Paris this year, Mother has decided to do an open house. Two of my nieces work for a major grocery chain, and they are organizing trays of finger food from their deli and bakery departments. One of my sisters and her daughters will be coming for the weekend, and she’ll organize the flowers and give me a hand getting ready. I’ll be adding things like shrimp trays, beverages, and holiday decorations.
To that end, we will begin decorating tomorrow. I have ornaments to hang from the chandelier, and I’ll swap Christmas themed wall hangings for those that normally cover our walls. I have evergreen swags and bows to put up on the carriage lights, and I plan to buy garland to drape at the front door.
I have one wreath, but I need four more. I use a lot of dried flowers and weeds when I make up wreaths, and sometimes I add silk flowers to the mix. Most of it is pretty understated and mellow. We’ll put up a tree in Mother’s sitting room, but the tree in our living room will have to wait until closer to Christmas.
I’ve tried for years to get Dear Husband to trim the roof line with white lights, but it’s never going to happen. We finally resorted to hanging the icicle lights in the front windows, and some years an angel made of grapevine, covered with tiny white Italian lights, greets our visitors.
So, tomorrow will be the start of our decorating season. Just call me Martha.