I was very busy today, finishing up paperwork, clearing the decks so that I can focus on decorating the house for Christmas, but after dinner, I just couldn’t avoid the thought that today would have been my mother’s 94th birthday.
It was just incredible that she lived to be 93. She didn’t like the fact that she had outlived most of her friends, and that she was the last of her generation. She told me one day that she didn’t want to live to be 100. I immediately chastised her, focusing on how amazing it would be to have lived an entire century. It took me a while to understand that she was lonely, and she missed those who had lived through the same experiences that had shaped her.
In a way, I understand. I no longer bother to look at “People” magazine. I haven’t a clue who those people are, and don’t care for their fashions. I’m disappointed that WGN 720 AM radio is changing, for the worse. I’ve listened to it for my lifetime, and now someone has decided that they need to take one of the most amazing stations in the nation and make it just like every other faceless station. How very sad to loose a good friend. I’m seriously thinking about deleting all the movie channels from our cable package. I just don’t enjoy the movies they are showing, and again, I have no idea who most of the actors are.
Mother went through that. Even though she and I shared interests, I hadn’t lived through the Depression or World War II. I enjoyed jazz with her, but I didn’t live through the era when it developed. Although I thought I understood, our experiences simply weren’t the same.
Mother was lonely. She wanted to be needed, and we were all busy trying to make life easier for her. Hindsight is very enlightening.
I hope that my mother is with her family and friends, and is at peace.