I was talking with a friend a week or so ago, and he made an off-hand comment about women and their secrets.
Whoa…..what was that?? I backed up and asked him just what he meant. I never really got a definitive answer. He feels that women keep secrets from men, and I personally think that we ALL have secrets, to some degree or other.
I think we all have things that we have done in our lives that we aren’t proud of. When I was young, I swiped some change from my mother’s purse. I’m definitely not proud of that, but I can tell you that I have not touched my mother’s purse in decades, and prefer to this day to hand it to her and let her look through it herself.
I wondered if he was referring to the fact that women tend to rise and go to the lady’s room together when they are on a night out. I teased my friend, telling him that we went so that we could discuss how the evening was going, and how hot (or not) our dates are. Of course, I haven’t dated anyone other than Dear Husband for more than two decades, so that’s really not the truth.
I had the feeling that my friend thinks there is something, well, mystical about women. I tend to think of myself as being very straight forward. I’m a WYSIWYG person. I don’t think I have secrets, but then who knows what a man is thinking?
Perhaps that is really what’s at the root of this conversation, the difference between the sexes. I doubt that men will ever understand women, but it’s just as safe to say that women will never understand men.
Do you think women keep secrets? Do you think MEN keep secrets? I do.
Everyone has secrets; but, I wouldn’t react to an accusation of keeping secrets by only thinking of the “bad” or “unflattering” secrets that I keep.
It is my secret that I have knowledge of certain events or facts when another person, obviously, wants to impress me with his/her knowledge of them. It is my secret that I would rather choose a different restaurant when another person, obviously, wishes to have a meal in their chosen restaurant. It is sometimes my secret that someone is being insensitive to my feelings–if this will foster better relationships between us in the future.
These strike me as peculiarly feminine secrets in which we engage to smooth the bumps in the roads of our lives. Perhaps this is something close to what you Dear Husband has in mind? Men have their own set of secrets that, perhaps, you might get DH to share with us!
It wasn’t DH who thought women had secrets, but you might be on the right track about those things we keep to ourselves that could hurt another. I hadn’t thought about that possibility. I agree that many a time we go with the flow rather than create a block in the road.
And, you’re right. My friend may not have meant that the secrets were a negative thing. Thanks for the insight.
You DID say a “friend”, Buffy. Somehow I got off track (but let’s keep that as a secret between us!)
Buffy, I’m inclined to believe that both sexes keep secrets… different kinds and from different people. I would not be willing to say that men or women keep more secrets than the other… or are more inclined to blab them. I do so dislike generalizations!
I agree with you about generalizations, Desiree. I know that they can be a helpful starting point fpr research or discussion, but we are all so individual that they end up being worthwhile for only the broadest issues.