I find it interesting when someone says they’ve lived their lives with no regrets. Don’t they ever get out of bed? Go outside? Say something dumb? Is having no regrets a reflection of living a timid, vanilla life, or an attitude that says, “Fast forward! I shall not dwell on life’s little beasties that get me down.”
Some days, I regret three or four things before breakfast.
My goal is to minimize regrets based on Shouldas. “I shoulda done this, I shoulda done that.” I would rather not have regrets based on things I should have done but didn’t have the time, courage, focus, aptitude or recognition that it was something I should have done. If I were listing them, many of the regrets would center on my early dating life, at which point I was an idiot. And then there would be not going on one of the water slides on Paradise Island, The Bahamas, because of my nagging claustrophobia. It’s no fun to drown in unrealized dreams.
And yet the people who say they don’t have any regrets are a lot like people whose best years were in high school. I’m not exactly sure why they are the same, except that many of them are the same people. Maybe I should have joined a few more clubs in high school.
As for regrets, I don’t dwell on them … but I have them. They are a part of life. As long as we learn from our regrets they can be positive things. As long as we don’t let them take the wheel, there’s nothing wrong with being at least a little sorry.
Very interesting post. I read just the other day a quote:
"A man knows he's old when his regrets outnumber his hopes and dreams," or something like that.
Well worth considering.
HAHA, I don't quite trust anyone who says that their best years were in high school. Mine certainly weren't -- those were the WORST years I can think of!
Living without ever having regrets really isn't living. A person has to admit they have regrets, and then not get caught up in the "woe is me, why didn't I do that?" mentality. If you can get to the end of your life embracing both your triumphs and failures, then you've lived, and lived well.
I find this an interesting topic. I've had a lot of discussions about living with no regrets. When my hubby (then live in luva) was diagnosed with Guillain Barre a few years back, they thought initially it was a brain tumor or MS. They thought he might never walk again. They just finished telling him that and I was beside myself crying. He looked at me and said, "don't cry Kimmy...I've lived every day the way I wanted to...there are kids that can't ever get out of bed...I've done it all! I have no regrets".
I found it amazing that he was able to say that, faced with such horrible news. He is an amazing person with an amazing attitude. I think positive people generally try to live without regrets.
a. i despised high school and thought the whole thing was a bad experience... but i survived.
b. i have no regrets.
c. yes, i have made mistakes, yes i have failed at things, yes i have done some seriously dumb things, but i don't regret them. they form who i am. i learned from those moments. it is in making those mistakes and doing those stupid things that i have learned my boundaries, my values and who i am... at least until i do something stupid again.
Regrets? I've had a few.
Wait... That's a song.
I can't say that I have no regrets. But I certainly don't dwell on them. Or try not to.
interesting point... when people ask me what I regret- I generally say "nothing." Sure, at the time I probably regretted doing or saying certain things, but I move forward and try not to dwell on the past. (Though more and more I am regretting the committment I made in becoming a homeowner...)
As a side note- I hated high school! I think I would have to say I am living the BEST years of my life right now! :)