Tonight I was bored. The fam is once again out of town (the PF had an appointment with a nutritionist in her parents' hometown – long story). Anyway, despite having some "homework" to get a little ahead of the workday tomorrow, I had little to do and there wasn't much on TV. Not like there's ever much on my TV (shunning cable means the rabbit ears only pick up 12 stations – 6 in English). So yeah, I watched ABC's "Hooking Up." I was routing for all of the ladies to find love until I realized if I were single, and especially in New York City, I probably would have been immediately in the discard pile.
I am blessed with a with-it woman who is beautiful, loving, capable, level-headed, sophisticated and backwoods at the same time, my soulmate. We are still deeply in love after knowing each other eight years (married for six and counting). It's something I don't deserve but have anyway. Can't blame the flat, dry West Texas desert where we first met for it. After all, I'm quite a catch, right? And I have tons to offer. Except on paper I'm pretty boring and wouldn't make most women's cut. I'm also a little goofy-looking. Hence it's a good thing I'm already married. To wit:
• I'm short; 5 feet, 7 inches on a good day. A lot of women seem to want someone tall. Why is that?
• I've got brown eyes and brownish hair. Dull! I'd show you my freckles, but uh, it's a private thing.
• Four-year journalism degree: I'm an idiot who can write.
• Journalism experience: I earn working-man wages because I'm an idiot who can write. And take photos. And edit other people's crap. And design pages.
• I live in the suburbs. In Texas. So I mow my own lawn and own a pickup truck. I also have a pair of cowboy boots. Texas is great, really it is. Just not one of the most dynamic places, if only because the 10 months of warm weather and urban mall-sprawl reaching its grayish fingers in all directions.
• I've got a sense of humor, but so does everybody else.
• I'm thoughtful, but don't really care to think about it.
• I'm athletic, but could still stand to lose a few pounds. I'd show you my killer calves and well, uh, twelve-pack abs. But it's a private thing.
• I don't take risks much anymore. Not that I was ever devil-may-care, but now practicality wins sometimes at the expense of fun. Snoozeville, people!
Some of these traits just ain't going away. But the ones that can are definitely on my to-do list. This is not to find another woman, but to make the woman who loves me get the full me I can be. I owe it to myself, too. You'd think that by age 31 I'd have learned some things. Oh, have I ever. Now it's just time to rededicate myself to applying some of those life lessons.
Nobody's perfect, except when we are the most perfect versions of ourselves we can become. Stick that on your inspirational calendar and smoke it! Gag.
As for "Hooking Up," and looking back on my long-ago dating life, maybe the people who we didn't agree with, or didn't click with, or didn't understand – maybe they weren't bad people. They just weren't the right person at that time. Do you think there's one person for everyone, or are there only certain types? Maybe it's easier to believe the latter while we secretly wish to find the former.
Hi bud!
Look at you, bored and alone and very introspective. Well, I don't agree w/you that you'd wind up in the discard pile.
Although, to be truthful, I DO like tall guys. Not that not-so-tall guys aren't great -- but the tall ones grab my attention -- not sure why. I'm 5'3" on a good day. BUT, as you may know or DO, some of my best guy friends swear that they're attracted to brunettes or red heads, but have a blonde woman walk down the street, and they babble like idiots...
You're a catch, dude.... Hope all is well w/PF... :)
By the way, saw a commercial for Hooking Up last night while with a male friend... He was intrigued... Meanwhile, I'm living it... I don't get the appeal of a single woman doing the whole online dating thing... This is "must see" TV? They need to film MY dates...
May be more suited for the comedy channel... Heeheehee!
Take Care, bud!
Omigosh, I just watched that show tonight as well! I was totally bored after work.
I couldn't believe it. Those women were soooo picky. Believe me, not all women in NYC are that whiny and self-entitled.
You're quite the catch T-Bone and PF is as lucky to have you as you are in having her. The both of you are so fortunate to be so in love. One day I hope to find that kind of happiness.
I'm sure you'd be in most womens keeper pile...don't sell yourself short! (no pun intended on the short part)
You're quite the catch T-Bone and PF is as lucky to have you as you are in having her. The both of you are so fortunate to be so in love. One day I hope to find that kind of happiness.
I'm sure you'd be in most womens keeper pile...don't sell yourself short! (no pun intended on the short part)
My husband always says the same thing about those shows ... that he'd never get picked either. He doesn't have the issue with being short (he's 6'1" ... and yes, I'm 5'3" and like taller guys), but with being bald. I try to tell him that girls really don't care, but he doesn't believe me! :) He thinks the same thing ... that he's boring on paper. But I'd rather have someone with great "boring" qualities, than the arrogant, superficial natures of most of the guys on these dating shows.
T, you're not boring, you're just not 18 anymore. If I were single now, I'd definitely be looking for stability in a partner. The PF IS lucky to have you!
"Maybe it's easier to believe the latter while we secretly wish to find the former." Bingo.
Dating sucks.
I too watched "Hooking Up" and I have to say I was reliving the not so distant past. I would be a self acclaimed Internet Dating Professional. I've been on more internet dates than I could count, and who did I end up engaged to? A guy I grabbed on the dance floor in a club in Laughlin! Not someone I met on the internet. It's tough living the single life. Sure it can be fun at times, but also very lonely.
I used to believe everyone had a soulmate.
But I guess being single in my 30's and having almost all of my friends still single in their 30's.... I think there is the right person at the right time. And then you either both commit and compromise and embrace changing and accepting your partner's changes as time passes... or you don't.
And at another time, you'll meet someone else who is *perfect* for you at the time and again, it's a matter of deciding to make a commitment.
But I don't think there is just *one* soulmate.
Does that make sense?
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