A blogism that I've seen in several places (including on my own blog) refers to "cheese sandwich posts." Those include entries that delve into the "exciting world" of what new tricks your cat has learned, what you decided to wear and, by its name, what you had for lunch. Bo-ring! Here at Texas T-bone, we (uh, I) strive to avoid those topics, though I am only human. To show that a cheese sandwich post won't talk about cats, clothes or what I'm actually having for lunch, I offer The Ultimate Cheese Sandwich Post. (I'm a dog person and plan to have Mexican for lunch)
Unless you expect a religious icon to appear on your sandwich, take this 12-step program to make sure your sandwich (and your blog) is all it can be:
1. Buy what I call "happy fun bread." I prefer sourdough, the kind that would make Dr. Atkins run screaming from the room if he could scream or run anymore. When the wife's in town, we get Tasteless Wheat®. That's neither happy nor fun, and a delicious sandwich it doth not make.
2. Buy the cheese of your choice because it's your sandwich. For me, it's gotta be "real" cheese. American cheese, no matter how much milk they put into it, never seems "real." I like extra sharp cheddar, mozerella, monterrey jack – or ALL THREE IN ONE! Yes folks, I live on the edge.
3. Butter the bread, baby! Real butter is kind of hard to spread and can scorch if your pan gets too hot. You have my permission to use the Spreadable Butter Substitute™ of your choice. Just a dab will do ya. We're not making a Butter Sandwich®.
4. Use your favorite frying pan. I prefer Calphalon® stainless steel because Teflon® or other Slippery-Surface® pans don't quite taste the same. Stainless pans let you taste your happy fun bread, real cheese and substitute butter.
5. It is important at this point to note that dropping your sandwich on the floor will make you return to step No. 1. Have some dignity! There is no 5-second rule! Germs don't tell time. I don't care how happy and fun your bread is, for the love of all that is holy, don't eat it! Don't! I see you! No! The hot pan will not sanitize your bread for you. Icky!
6. Turn your stovetop on to medium heat. Too hot will brown the outside of the bread too quickly without providing the just-right melt factor to your real cheese. Using the appropriate sandwich-flipping implement, check the bottom side for desired browness, then use it to flip the sandwich over. The second side often cooks faster because the pan has continued to absorb heat.
7. Once the bread is browned the way you like it, and you have (carefully!) opened up a corner of your creation to check the meltiness of the cheese, it is ready to put on a sanitary eating surface. Please note, again, that the floor is not a suitable surface from which to eat.
8. Think about this next step carefully. Are you going to cut your sandwich or just eat it like a gorilla? Be civilized. You've gone to so much trouble not to drop the thing on the floor, don't turn back now. Cutting it in half is good, but will it be to make rectangular halves or triangular halves? Are you going to go a step further and cut it into quarters? How dainty! It will be like having four little sandwiches on your plate. Give it a rest. Just cut it in half, whichever way you want.
9. I used to put mustard on my cheese sandwich, but the Petite Fiilet berated me until I no longer reach for it. I eat it sans condiment, unless the butter I put on it before cooking counts. This way I can taste the cheese and happy fun bread. I came by my disgusting habit naturally because my parents both cover their cheese sandwiches with mustard, sometimes in combination with mayo. Mayonaise is just plain wrong. It should not even exist.
10. What goes well with a cheese sandwich? I like Fritos® because their uncheesey nature won't compete or cause other problems later on. But steamed broccoli, corn on the cob, a fresh garden salad or asparagus with lemon butter pairs nicely. Knock yourself out on the side dishes.
11. What to drink? It's a little low-brow, but I like water. Nothing washes down anything better. Sure, you can fancy it up with a frosty mug of beer, or maybe a flavored, carbonated beverage. Having wine with your grilled cheese seems to take "wine and cheese" pairings in the wrong direction, but do what you will. I'd be interested to know if anyone drinks wine with a grilled-cheese sandwich.
12. Enjoy!
What more can be said? I don't think there's anything. But if I missed an important part of the grilled-cheese experience, I would love for you to share.
Oh you are SO not helping w/ my carb cravings. I like the sharp cheddar also and NOT the processed kind that comes pre-sliced. Yuck!
Great post! My technique is pretty similar to yours, though I always have trouble getting the pan to just the right temperature. I need to be more patient I guess.
Have a great weekend T-bone.
Ahhh, I ADORE grilled cheese sandwiches. My brother-in-law always says, "That's not real food! It's just an ol' sandwich." SACRILIGE. He hates anything that looks like a sandwich anyway. A grilled cheese can be plain, or you can add all kinds of goodies to it! Or, you can eat it with a bowl of cream of tomato soup - my favorite!! MMmMMmmmmMMMmm. Now you've done it. I'm hungry.
Wow...I didn't know so much passion and thought could go into a cheese sandwich. Now I'm hungry. Not very nice, Mr. TBone.
I actually did a cheese-sandwich demonstration post for an interview thing. I typed "Today I had a cheese sandwich for lunch", and then deleted the post. :-)
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