Those of us who observe the Americanized holidays are about to be launched into the hustle and bustle of the season. For some reason, we're all supposed to get busier all of a sudden and be filled with good cheer and good will toward all. Maybe it's (for most of us) dealing with harsher weather, or maybe the reason for the season is such that friendliness and optimism are just bound to happen. Nobody gets hurt if, like a fat man in a red suit stuck in a chimney, we don't make an ash of ourselves (or our elves).
I heard that for those of us with wee ones, there's a toy shortage brewing for "the most popular toys in the universe for this year." Apparently, a logjam at a hustling and bustling California port means Bratz dolls and the like are stranded shipboard. Oh, sweet solutions ...
• Don't make the holidays be about gifts. Make it about chocolate. And lots of it.
• Use this year to teach your kiddos about the evils of materialism and what really matters: chocolate.
• Go through your kids' old toys and donate them to charity. Or better yet, donate all the ones you've already bought for them to charity. Stuff chocolate in their mouths to muffle the whining.
• Spending gazillions on tree and yard decorations (for the Christmas revelers among us) sends the wrong message. On our tree this year? Hershey's Kisses®, Nestle's Crunch® and Mars M&M® candies. Ya know: chocolate. I wanted to just wrap our fake tree in aluminum foil to look like a giant Kiss. The wife said, "No!"
• The ultimate stocking-stuffer is .... (drumroll, please) ... chocolate.
• For those who celebrate other holidays, let's put aside our differences and unite over something sweet and tasty. And it rhymes with gawk-a-lot.
• Nothing says love like your likeness carved into chocolate.
• Studies have shown that chocolate triggers pleasure centers in the brain that can eclipse the pleasures of sex. That's a shame. I say find a quiet place with your lover, douse each other in chocolate syrup and see where it takes you.
• Cheese balls (you know, those nutty round things you spread onto crackers) should be replaced with mounds of chocolate.
• Instead of Santa Claus, gifts should be delivered around the world by Count Chocula, the M&M guys and whatever other obnoxious character tries to make us buy chocolate these days.
• With the Halloween sugar rush subsiding, it's time to refocus our efforts on the C word. We don't have to worry about the adverse affects until New Year's rolls around. With enough chocolate, we'll be able to roll around, too!
Once again, I make the mistake of blogging while I'm hungry. Anyone got any chocolate?
***POST-LUNCH UPDATE
I had a pepperoni calzone that, had I not been so hungry, I would have made into a hat so I could enjoy its cheesey goodness all day. Also would have helped keep me warm while spending time outdoors in our dropping temperatures. It was 80 degrees this time last week; it's now about 50. Calzone. Those Italian chefs are geniuses, I tell you!
On Monday, get the stromboli
I'm all for Chocolate Christmas!
mmmm...sugary goodness
happy
all
day
:)
"My name is T-Bone and I'm a chocoholic." Very good T-Bone, now pass the candle.
hmmm...
mawklit? No, that's not it
How 'bout walklit? No, not that either
rhymes with gawk-o-lot you say?
gosh, I don't know, I give up :)
I can't decide which I like better: chocolate or the image of you wearing a calzone as a hat.