I’m posting my “Friday” entry early because I’ve got to start packing for the trip, mow the lawn, wash the dogs, get a few road snacks, etc. Have a great weekend, everyone! I'll be back on Tuesday!
FAREWELL, BUG-KILLING BIKER CHICK
My department is losing a fantastic employee. She's worked for the company 20 (yes, 20) years. Many of us couldn't imagine staying anywhere for half that long. Her husband owns a pest-control company, and she is quitting to help him kill bugs. That is quite a job in Texas, where everything is bigger – including the insects. She's already licensed to do so and everything. Anyway, she will be missed! How much?
1. I'll have to start killing the spiders and mice that invade my office myself.
2. Her replacement, who has worked here for nearly 30 years, is not qualified for the job. Everyone who has asked me, "Did so-and-so get promoted?" and heard me say "Yep." has gotten wide-eyed in disbelief. Even people he will be working with outside the company are a little frightened. The job is hard. I wish him the best. But this will be entertaining and yet sadly unsatisfying to watch.
3. I'll miss the music she played in her office, which is right next to mine.
4. I won't miss it that much, because she offered to give me her old stereo tomorrow when she leaves.
5. She is a great person. Like a (slightly) older sister to me.
6. She's got a great laugh.
7. She always tells it like it is.
8. She is very giving. (See Nos. 4 and 14).
9. She's 45 years old, 5 feet tall and rides a motorcycle. Very cool chick.
10. She's a great mom to her two children, and a good wife to her very tall husband.
11. She knew what she was doing in her job better than anyone else in the building.
12. She never got credit for all she did.
13. I could always count on her.
14. She was the only one from my office who offered to cook us dinner after the Cutlet was born.
15. Because of her help and encouragement, our department secretary lost 100 pounds in less than a year on Weight Watchers.
16. She confided in me when everyone else here was acting stupid.
17. She can roll her eyes like nobody else.
18. Twenty years is something to be proud of. Plus, she was a walking archive of anecdotes and crazy stories about our company. She knows where the bodies are buried.
19. We’ll have far too few wacky recipes to sample, like the time she made ultra-yummy-yet-strange black bean brownies.
20. Who will I confide in when everyone else is acting dumb?
Good luck and God bless, Deborah! Sorry you're "bugging" out!
