If you've ever gathered together with a bunch of church ladies, this question has probably come up more than once. It is a reference to the two women in Luke 10:38-42. Jesus had been teaching in Galilee and had stopped to visit his friends in Bethany, Martha and Mary. Sisters, by this account.
Think about this, now. How often have we said that we're surprised by how different two siblings can be? Apparently, that's our Martha and Mary. And, with all the ensuant conflict as well. Martha (I don't think it's a bit ironic that Martha Stewart reigns over the domestic world!) is making a meal - no small feat 2000 years ago. No gas stove, no refridgeration. No sir, this chick probably was butchering and spitting the meat and building the fire in the pit just to get her little dinner party going. (And we whine about the water spots on the crystal!)
Anyway, Mary had the unmitigated gall to sit before Jesus' feet! Sitting on her tush, probably chewing on a piece of jerky with a wine chaser, and waxing poetically about the desert sunsets.
Excuse me! Could I get a little help here!?
Mary as it turns out is praised for her choice - to sit in honor of the guest, to worship at his feet. Jesus does not diminish Martha's work or the need for it to be done, but suggests that she needs to worry less about it.
As with all stories in the Bible, we're left to examine a relatively sparse story. Our job is to figure out the subtleties with very little information. Jesus does not say that Martha's choice is wrong, but suggests that she overly focused on the work.
How often do you spin yourself into a tizzy over dinner parties, holiday gatherings, visits from friends and relatives. Could the message be that we need to enjoy the moment, praising God in the little stuff, while we make our preparations?
So what if things are not perfect?
I recall a visit from family some years ago. As a working mother, my house is a long way from pristine. I live with dirt, okay! It took along time for me to adjust to that and, even now, I occasionally look forward to a time when my house stays clean after I clean it. I remember that I was still cleaning well into a day after their arrival. I remember that weekend with some regret. I regret that I just didn't push the piles to the side and sit amongst my family and talk. I regret missing an opportunity to experience the joy of their stay and relaxing over a simple dinner. I was totally Martha that day, and angry at my husband and children for making the mess and for not helping to clean it up.
I think what Jesus is asking us to consider is that while there certainly is work that must be done, we must find a balance between work and peace. Perhaps, it's in the merging of the two that we experience the love of Christ.
Thank you, dear sis. I appreciate the citation.
We all know industrious women who can whip up a meal, keep the house clean, raise children and manage a career. And we know women who sit around, expecting to be waited on. From this perspective, Martha is to be treasured.
But, perhaps Mary was the wiser. Was the important thing the preparation of the meal, or was the chance to learn first-hand from Jesus more important? Do we live for the day, or do we expand our horizons to eternity?
This makes me crazy, because I'd really like to "get a little help here," most of the time. I wonder if I am missing the point, and that I should be DIRECTING those around me to help me get things done, so that we all can put daily chores behind us and focus on the bigger picture?
We all feel that industrious Martha is a good woman, but Jesus says that Mary has made a wise choice. Having good meals and a clean home is important, but not the most important thing we can do.
Ludwig Mies van der Rohe said "God is in the details," implying that restraint in architectural design was to be valued. Perhaps this applies to Martha and Mary: forget the spotted wine glasses and focus on the message.
You know, I've had about 30 minutes of conversation with myself because of this post. I've surged this way, and that, and you've gotten just the tip of the iceberg. I don't know if it makes any sense, or if I'm totally off the mark. But....I think this will be something interesting for us to discuss in person one day.
Love you. *S*
It's a tough problem. The fact that it hits so close to home makes it doubly hard to "back off" from it and regard in objectively. I think two things I would have added are that we need to be better delegaters - better at asking for help. We're HORRIBLE at this (a martyr thing?? Is that hereditary, do you suppose? :)) The second thing is that we need to be better at not sweating the small stuff. Of course, that is part of the whole "getting a priority" thing. They are inextricably connected.
When I choose to ignore dishes and making beds to get on to more interesting things, I have double the load to do when I finally get back to the chores. I'm sure you're right about delegating more. I don't know if this came about because we saw TV homemakers who cleaned house in high heels, shirtwaist dresses and pearls, or because as feminists, we felt we could do it all. (Yes.....it's hereditary.)
I'd love to take a class on not sweating the small stuff. I REALLY need to see the bigger picture, and relax a bit.
Nan, this post certainly got me thinking. I think Buffy is right. The theme of Christ's teaching was so often on setting aside worldy considerations in favor of spiritual ones. Also it is said translations from the original text make Christ's admonishment more abupt than it was.
With no regard to stove temperature, dinner can be overdone. I recall one invitation Hub and I received to dine at the home of a close family member that we grew up with but seldom had an opportunity to visit with. Six of us all dining together with a great deal of catching-up to do. It was not the comfortable visit we had hoped it would be because our hostess went to so much bother. The lace, the linens, salad plates, dinner plates, bread plates, three forks, napkins, napkin holders, her very best china. And with so many table settings to rotate the hostess (who we were so anxious to chat with) was seldom in her chair. As a result, conversation was fractured and disconnected.
Old Aunty and Hub didn't say anything, but as soon as they were assigned their velvet-cushioned chairs in the elabrately set up dining room, both removed the extra forks, salad plates, and bread plates, and took them to the kitchen before the meal commenced. And both traded in their linen napkins for paper. After all, we are family. There is no one among us that needs or can impress the other.
So I can only think that in this narrative, Christ's appeal was for a repast with dear ones that would encourage fellowship rather than imped it. I think he also felt uncomfortable as Hub and Old Aunt did about all the "extra" work, fuss, and bother.
But still Nan, I like you, have a similar emotional reaction to the close friend or relative that sees how busy I am and sits wedged behind my table blithering away with not even a token offering to lend a hand.
Different times, different perspectives -- I guess.