Court Case BS: August 2002 Archives

I've been working on this post all week...ok let me rephrase that, I've been MEANING to post this all week, however, life, work and other things have a way of interfering with such plans.
BlueWolf sent me a link on INTERNET addiction this past week, which actually had reference to two women getting their kids taken away due to this problem...

when I read it, I literally felt sick..I could not for the LIFE of me understand how anyone could do that to their children. The excerpt from the page is at the bottom for those who want to go see what I'm talking about. (see the second instance)

I will admit, when I was married, I was looking for an escape, and I found it...not in the best way or place I could have I'm sure, however, my kids were always fed, had clean clothes, were clean themselves, and in bed on time. They were taken to school, picked up, and I was also secretary of the PTA (yea I hear you snickering out there!) and was the one responsible for taking them to any activities they were involved in (such as when my oldest played t-ball) also helped out in their classes when I could (this references when my oldest was in pre-k and I was 'room mother' for lack of a better term)..so while it was a problem, it was not near as big as he is trying to make it..
actually I think his biggest problem was not how I was regarding the children, it was regarding him..my overuse of the INTERNET (so to speak) did not start until after I asked for a divorce (almost 2 years before I left him!)...so I ask you, what do you really think his problem with all of this is?

but lets talk about now, which is the information they are asking about in the papers I got.

do I spend allot of time on here? heck not near as much as I'm accused of.
ask anyone, hell ask my kids, my computers not even TURNED ON when they are here..(and honestly when they are not what business is it of his?)

being on-line does not make someone a bad parent...neglecting your kids, be it due to being on-line or any other reason..well now thats a different story isn't it?

thoughts?

an excerpt from Outlook Press
Ask any lesbian and she will tell you that coming out was probably the most stressful time in her life. Stories of being disowned by family and termination of long-term friendships are common. Even when family and friends accept you for your true self, the dynamics of each relationship changes. Now imagine, if you will, a woman in a heterosexual marriage with children making the decision to come out as a lesbian. One of the biggest concerns for a woman in that situation has always been custody of the children. Many lesbians who divorce their husbands continue to lead very closeted lives for fear of a protracted custody battle with their ex.
for the full story go here

This is referring to a case here in OK that is cited in several cases I have been looking at, Fox v. Fox which in fact number 9 states this
"The father's custody motion was grounded in his assertion that the mother's sexual proclivities are immoral and in contradiction of religious values. However, the father testified that he is not aware of any direct harm to the children and that there are no signs that the children's school performances and behavior patterns or their relationships with the immediate and extended family, peers, and community have been adversely affected by the mother's behavior. And, the father did not present any evidence to prove the essential determinative factor - a significant change of circumstance that directly and adversely affects the children. Hence, we find that the father failed to meet his burden of proof as established in Gibbons v. Gibbons, David v. David, and Gorham v. Gorham, supra."

this does differ slightly from my case due to the fact that I filed for the modification in my case, due to their father not following the agreement that we came up with when we divorced, however he is trying to use my being a lesbian (and the Internet) against me. I have yet to find anything with reference to the Internet in a case like this, but I don't see how he can use it when I don't even get on the darn computer when the kids are up!
There is also the fact that to my knowledge (unless someone else has told them)
my kids don't even know, I am EXTREMELY discreet, as I feel you should be when it comes to relationships and children, even in a hetero relationship. Your kids don't need to know what goes on behind closed doors in your bedroom, period.
comments on this are very welcome, I would love to hear what you think of this.

yes I know its been awhile, but I've been doing some serious thinking and discussing things with others and I've come to a few decisions.

first off, I'm not going anywhere, some of you may not care, some of you may be glad, most are probably indifferent *s* but on the advice of my lawyer NOT to take down my site (since if they already know where it is they can use it against me if its removed) I'm staying put..and actually I only have to tell him where the main page is.

I've been doing some reading and research and found a few things pertaining to my case that I will probably be putting up here, (with commentary of course) for reasons I'm sure you can figure out..heck might as well give them an education if I've got to give in!

on a slightly different note, will the person that uses AO(hel)L who was here 6 times on the 19th with a total of 14 page views coming from an unknown referrer please step forward? they were also here once on the 20th, and they use Windows ME..it wouldn't have been so obvious had you not come 4 times within 20 minutes but hey that sort of thing sets off alarms with me *s*

to finish up, I have set up 2 new blogs for dear friends of mine. I would appreciate it if you would go check them out, as they are new to all of this and I'm sure would like to hear from others besides just myself and BlueWolf *s*

Jamie's Sacred Space and KG's Hideaway
and before you ask they are both very hetero and very married! LOL

till next time..

Well I finally got some news on the court front yesterday.
I received the papers I need to fill out for disclosure...and of all the asinine things they want to know, they want a listing of all websites I have 'operated' since April 24th of this year, ..goes to show what a wonderful lawyer he has..the divorce was finalized April 24th of LAST year..his secretary is none to bright I'm afraid..she even forgot to notify him when the court case was last year..*L*
geezz..if they had any idea what they're asking here...they have no idea how many sites I DO run..most of them in relation to an on-line group I'm in..and one I was in..this one and my other site..then theres the page I'm doing for work..several I've done for friends..hell I don't think I know how many I've done!!
anyway..if I do end up having to disclose this information (you can bet I'm going to ask my lawyer just what relevance this has in a custody modification case) I will be temporarily taking this site down..so if you come here and get a 'on hiatus' page you will know why..rest assured I will be back *you have been warned!*