OK..she not only passed it she did an AWESOME job on it *s*
I knew you could do it babe..(can I say I told you so now? *g*)
June 2002 Archives
Blue Wolf is taking her test, well right now as I type this... *s*
She was up studying in the wee hours of the morning..and stressing out over it..
and I just wanted her to know (as if she wouldn't *s*) that I'm thinking of her and pulling for her ;-)
good luck baby..I know you'll do great..
Well as you can see I'm back..
I want to take a moment to thank EVERYONE for their support, be it public or private..it really helped allot more than you probably realize, and for most of you taking time to comfort a virtual stranger..well it really means allot to me...
the service was lovely, all of her children were able to be there, as were most of her grandkids and great-grandkids..(I found out she currently has 25 grandkids and 31 great-grandkids) I don't think the chapel where they had it had ever seen anything quite like it.
She has one sister left alive, who after the service when everyone around was saying stuff like 'shes in a better place now, shes not hurting anymore' etc..
said "yes, but we don't have her here with us anymore"...I lost it..I know all the other stuff is true also..and she will always live on in our hearts..but shes not HERE physically with us anymore..and never will be again...*sighs* that thought will take some getting used to...
in other news..as you can see I got the new design done..its amazing how coding can occupy your mind (takeover is more like it!)
if you want to see "the" image..its on the main page Here (opens in new window) not completely sure what to do with the rest of the site yet but at least the layouts done..and I'm actually a bit impressed with myself on what I learned to do.
*these links will open in a new window*
This http://www.w3schools.com/css/default.asp is an great site for learning to do your own style sheets
and this http://adashimar.hypermart.net/ssi.htm really helped allot in me getting that pesky SSI figured out!
This is going to be a short one..
I got the call tonight..the aneurysm on her aorta burst this morning..she held on this evening when she passed on..
heaven called one of its angels home..
Since my darling has gone off on a posting frenzy she seems to think I need to update..so now that her guilt trip is working here I sit wondering what the hell am I gonna write about? (*g* love ya babe)
bad news first..Grandma is back in the hospital due to her being unable to eat. they were correct in her only having one aneurysm, but it is still getting bigger and the reason they thought it was 2 was its between her heart and stomach (where exactly it is I'm not sure)
I'm sure most of you are sick yourselves of hearing about this..but, its my blog, *s*
In unrelated news, I found THE image..of course now I have to change the whole layout I had in mind but I know it will be worth it *s*
only 2 more weeks to go...*BFG*
I don't know what is going on around the net here lately but it seems I'm not the only one suffering from lack of sleep. Sleeping only 4-5 hours a day makes it very hard to stay awake at night..however when I get home in the morning I'm wide awake and then up by 3 most afternoons..its just at night when the world is dark and still, you wish you could just lay down and drift off..but paperwork beckons *sigh* I'll be so glad when we get this new system done...
not that I'll get any more sleep then but at least I won't feel so stressed at work.
I miss my boys..I want this BS over with..I want to go 'home'
*deep sighs*
I think I'm reaching that point where I hate the thought of redoing my site..
I've been working on templates (with major help in that area..thank you honey), graphics, etc.. for days now and I'm about to give up.
its not that I don't know how or what I'm doing..I do.
I'm just not happy with how its turning out..
OK it SUCKS
its not me..not at all..
*sighs* I think my major problem with it is I keep going back to my old site..the graphic, the title, all of it was perfect for me, (and I'm not the only one that says that)..but perfect for me in that point in time..I've moved on..
and hit a damn roadblock..
I can't seem to find anything that reaches out and grabs me like that image did..I HAD to use that..it was just what I had been looking for..
so I search..and comment..and tech support..write emails..and stall working on it..
shit maybe I need a nap.
In honor of my friend Jet I give you The Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood Name Generator. Mine was Empress Still Night (using regular name) or Princess Chocolate Lover(using my nicname)..how appropriate on both of those..LOL.
and now...
All of my readers have been wonderful with this situation concerning my Grandma..I'm sure some of you are getting tired of reading about her..well if so go somewhere else today :-Þ
I have wonderful news on that front..it seems this lady that "wouldn't leave the hospital alive" according to her Dr's..is home *s* shes under hospice "type" care according to my mom..resting comfortably in her own home, and still feisty as hell...
according to my dad (who talked to her the other day) when he asked her if she wanted them to come up for a visit she said..and I quote.."well I guess I can put up with you guys for a couple days" (shaking head) yep sounds just like her..still hanging in there and still fighting, I wouldn't have expected any less.
now for something thats been going through my head lately..
I spend allot of time reading other blogs..lord knows I really should spend less time doing that and more on other stuff on here I need to do, but I digress..
and allot of the time something I see on them gets me thinking and leads to one of these posts *s*
I wonder sometimes..does anyone really have the 'right' to speak for a whole group of people..I mean we all have our feelings one way or another on certain matters, but isn't everyones situation different depending on themselves personally, where they live (be it country of origin or even place within that country) and themselves personally?
Yes I'm gay. Do I feel I have the right to speak for the whole gay 'community' because of that? heck no! the problems I face living in a small town in 'little Dixie' are much different than someone who lives in a larger town or a different area of the US. And I'm sure people in other country's face a whole different set of problems as well..maybe they are more accepting of things there..maybe not..but we need to remember that the Internet is a big place not only composed of people living in the USA and maybe the problems they face are not the same as the ones we do here.
now..this post I agree with..
I don't take it as a personal attack on gays (maybe cause I see more of it on het. blogs?) however, I take it as someone who doesn't want to read about what you do in your personal life..which is fine. however you have as much right to feel that way and not read it as someone else does to write it..if I see posts like that I move on..heck if I wanted to start a flame war god knows I've had enough posted in my own (past) comments and on other blogs of people who don't even KNOW me to do so..pick your battles..if its worth fighting then by all means do so..but if its just a missunderstanding..talk about it...discuss it..the Internet is a wonderful diverse place where we can all learn from each other..both on our differences and our similarity's..
Think about it
p.s. yes I am going to be changing my layout soon..so if things get crazy looking here you know why *s*
as it was pointed out to me this morning its been a while since I updated..(gee no kidding) so lets see, where to begin..
We were right, grandma doesn't know everything thats going on, come to find out she has 2 aneurysms (one on her aorta one on her stomach) its the one on her stomach thats getting bigger, they were caused by the cancer treatments they were giving her, and aggravated by the meds..so she is now off all meds and being given morphine *sighs* other than that I have no idea whats going on..
FINALLY got to see my kids this weekend!! they have been gone to their cousins the last 2 weeks (since school got out) so this weekend was spent at the park playing hide & seek, swinging on the swings (mental note: do that before eating next time!) playing Nintendo and snuggling on the couch with the 3 of them *big smiles* however I miss them like crazy already!! *pout*
found out this last week also that he did contact his lawyer..and filed for an extension *rolling eyes* so still waiting to see what kind of crap he comes up w/ on this case.
OK, now on another note..there has been some talk going around lately about real vs. web..is one more real than the other..well I don't know about you personally but I am a real person sitting here at this keyboard..(there are some I do tend to wonder about however..*g*)
I've been involved in 'Internet relationships', I've met some very dear people on this little machine..some have moved into my '3D' life, some will probably remain forever on here, does that make them any less of a 'friend' to me..no, I don't feel that it does. to me the definition of a friend is someone who is there for you, doesn't judge you, listens to you, kicks your ass when needed, etc...(and I know there are allot more things I want to say in regards to that however w/ as little sleep as I've had today I can't think of them, but most of it could probably be found Here)
I guess where I'm trying to go with this is that just because you don't see who's on the other side of the keyboard doesn't make them any less real or any less of a friend. I know there are exceptions (and I've meet a few of those to!) to this, but for the most part..well lets just say I would trust more people I've met on here rather than off...as this tends to be more anonymous at times and we feel more open to be ourselves rather than worry what others we meet irl will think, making us put up the walls and don the masks that tend to go along with that..
*shrugs* just my opinion on the matter...
